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Posts tagged funny.

Butch: “You okay?” 
Marsellus Wallace: "Naw man. I’m pretty fucking far from okay."

Butch: “You okay?”

Marsellus Wallace: "Naw man. I’m pretty fucking far from okay."

An old couple are sitting in front of a TV, and the wife puts a video for the husband, and hands him a box.

In the video, a young version of the husband introduces himself, explains about the Alzheimers, and then tries to get him to remember his love for his wife by recounting his favorite stories about them, while pulling things out of the box that help him jog his memory.

Source: contactt
tastefullyoffensive:

via

How true is this?

tastefullyoffensive:

via

How true is this?

Via: lycrest
ahahaha

ahahaha

jerktwins:



SCHOOL IN 3 DAYS D:

jerktwins:


SCHOOL IN 3 DAYS D:

simcsl:

How I Met Your Mother ! 

simcsl:

How I Met Your Mother ! 

spidermanspiderman:

http://robsunshiner.tumblr.com/

Answer the Bone-A-Phone
Assault on a Friendly Weapon
Backstroke Roulette
Baiting your Hook
Batting Practice
Bash The Candle
Beat Off
Beating the Bait
Beating the Bishop
Beating the Dummy
Beating the Snake
Beating the Stick
Beating your Meat
Being your Own Best Friend
Bleed the Weed
Blow Your Load
Bludgeon the Beefsteak
Boppin’ your Bologna
Buckin’ it
Buffing the Banana
Buffing the Wood
Burping the Worm
Butter Your Corn
Calling Down For More Mayo
Carrying Weight
Cast Off
Changing your Oil
Charm the Cobra
Choaking Charlie ‘till He Throws Up
Choke Kojak
Choke your Chicken
Civil War
Cleaning out your Rope
Clean the Pipes
Clean your Rifle
Clubbing Eddy
Couch Hockey for One
Cracking the Fat
Crank the Shank
Cranking
Crank Your Cordiano
Crown the King
Cuff the Carrot
Cuffing the Puppy
Custer’s Last Stand
Date Miss Michigan
Date Mother Palm and Her Five Daughters
Devil’s Handshake (Catholic School)
Diddle
Dishonorable Discharge
Disseminating
Doddle Whacking
Doodle Your Noodle
Do The Dew
Drain the Dragon
Drain the Monster
Drain the Vein
Dropping A Line
Dropping Stomach Pancakes
Firm Your Worm
Fist your Mister
Five Against One
Five Finger Knuckle Shuffle
Five Knuckle Olympics
Flogging Your Dong
Flogging Your Log
Flute Solo
Flying a Kite
Fondle the Fig
Freeing the Willies
Frigging the Love Muscle (British)
Gallop the Antelope
Gallop the Maggot
Getting In Touch With Your Manhood
Getting In Touch With Yourself
Getting to Know Yourself Personally in the “Biblical Sense”
Getting Your Caps Peeled
Giving it a Tug
Grease the Pipe
Greasing your Bone
Hack the Hog
Ham Shank
Hand Job
Hands on Training
Hand to Gland Combat
Hand Work
Having a Roy (Australian)
Have it Off
Have One Off the Wrist
Hitchhike Under the Big Top
Hitching to Heaven
Hit the Ham
Holding All The Cards
Holding Your Sausage Hostage
Hone your Bone
Hump your Fist
Hump your Hose
Humpin’ Air
Ironing Some Wrinkles
Jack Hammer
Jack Off
Jackin’
Jackin’ the Beanstalk
Jag Off
J Arthur Rank
Jazz Yourself
Jelly Roll
Jerk Off
Jerk the Gherkin
Jerk the Johnson
Jiggle the Jewelry
Jimmying your Joey
Killing the Beast
Knock the Top Off
Knuckle Shuffle on your Piss Pump
Launching the Hand Shuttle
Leakin’ the Main Drain
Loping your Mule
Making the Bald Guy Puke
Making Nut Butter
Making Yogurt
Mangle the Midget
Manipulate the Mango
Manual Override
Masonic Secret Self Handshake
Massage your Muscle
Massage your Purple-Headed Warrior
Measuring For Condoms
Milking the Bull
Milking the Lizard
Milking the Monkey
Milkywaying
Moulding Hot Plastic
Nerk your Throbber
Oil the Glove
Oiling The Pogo Stick
One Handed Clapping
One Man Show
One Man Tug-O-War
Pack your Palm
Paddle the Pickle
Paint the Pickle
Pain the Walls
Pam Anderson Polka
Pat the Robertson
Peel Some Chilis
Peel the Banana
Peel the Carrot
Petting Your Dog
Playing With richard
Playing With Susi Palmer and her five friends
Playing With Your Noodle

Text this to a girl.

Me: Happy Mothers Day.

Her: I’m not a mom.

Me: Not yet, coming over now.

post results.

Leadership. Hilarious and inspiring.